The Breeches You Have To Have!
Last night, there I was standing at the kitchen sink, doing the dishes. I had just taken my makeup off, and changed in to the daggiest (but warm and super comfy) tracky pants. When my husband came up behind me and said ‘Hell, you are so HOT doing those dishes’.
And my immediate response was ‘Don’t be silly, I am JUST doing the dishes and ONLY wearing these daggy trackies.’
But then I paused for half a second (whilst remembering my current goal to rewire my negative thought patterns).
And then I said ‘Actually – I AM damn hot!’. And he smiled and laughed. Then he said, ‘That’s much better’, and gave me a hug.
And suddenly I was smiling. And I WAS the hottie, hanging out in trackies and doing the dishes – that he sees.
Because I am trying to believe in myself, and cut myself some slack. Because I am harsh. Very bloody harsh, when it comes to judging myself.
And I do appreciate just how lucky I am, to have such an amazing supportive husband who thinks the world of me (and who will eventually let me have 20 horses, not just 2!).
But us women have far too many insecurities.
We are our own toughest critics.
Even when our partners tell us how sexy we are, we can never quite believe in their words. We just don’t feel it within ourselves.
Because society almost demands that we put ourselves down as women. And that women should never accept a compliment – as they aren’t deserving, and must be humble, or some crap like that. After all, none of us mere mortal women, can match up with those super stars they show on TV and in magazines right? And therefore we somehow feel we are lesser than they are.
But they aren’t superstars. Not really. It’s all just perception. Society is pretty screwed in my opinion. We place so much value on movie stars and football players, many of whom are not exactly model citizens, and yet we are supposed to look up to them. Like they are the winners of the world? I don’t think so. They aren’t model citizens. The media reveals that every single day.
The real heros in my mind, are the unsung every-day heroes. Like us mums.
YES us mums! We dedicate our lives, to raising small children and provide as much guidance as we can muster, to allow them to grow up to be as successful as they can be. To make a valid contribution to the good of society. To raise the next generation who can further the world to new heights. Even though, we are stuck in the meantime, wiping snotty noses, putting endless quantities of bandaids on imaginary wounds, and swatting their little hands away, as we try desperately to go to the god damn toilet (you’ve ONLY been waiting and holding on for the past 9 hours after all!).
This is NO small or easy task - this mothering business. Really it’s not, when you think about it.
But even if you aren’t a mum. Us women in our entirety are truly powerful. Whilst yes, inequalities still exist, we still manage to fight out way through it. We make our mark. We try our best to stand tall – and make a difference to the world. Even if it’s on a small scale.
So yes, I too am doing my best to fight off my insecurities. To become the successful business woman I know I can be. Know I am. To somehow keep my sense of self and sanity intact, whilst I juggle the superhuman effort of motherhood, business owner, horse rider and goodness knows what else I am meant to be.
But its tricky! In fact it’s really quite hard. For some strange reason we are compelled to compare ourselves to other women. Women we perceive as being hotter than we are. More successful than we are. And it sucks. Because when it all is said and done, we really are all the same. Secretly wishing we were someone else, whilst they are secretly wishing they were you.
It’s time to stop that crappy thinking – I reckon!
Yet what does any of this have to do with horses? Well, let me tell you.
Our confidence levels and perceptions of ourselves, has a major impact, on how we see ourselves as horse women or horse riders.
If we feel we have a flaw in other areas of our life, you can be pretty darn certain that it will show up either on or around our horse. Horses are like that. They are great at exposing our weaknesses and quite often - playing on them(!).
But they are also great at forcing us to take stock, face our weakness, work through that weakness, and finally overcome that weakness.
But there is a problem. In the English riding world, we are expected to wear riding breeches.
(Cue the dramatic music here…)
I am deadly serious though. As wearing a pair of riding breeches can be god damn hard for many of us horsey girls. They reveal every single part of our body. And when we aren’t confident or comfortable in our own skin, ‘bearing all’ in a pair of tight, skinny, sticky, thin pants - can be super daunting.
And it doesn’t matter how awesome other people might think you look in them – you tend to feel like crap. And horribly exposed…
But you know you NEED to wear a pair of breeches. Particularly if you have a riding lesson with an instructor who is a stickler for tradition (and exposing your riding flaws!), or if you want to go to Adult Riding Club where they’re mandatory, or something else along those lines.
And especially if you want to compete (so don’t even get me started on the obligatory WHITE breeches either!).
Because that’s what’s expected. In the English riding world at least. That you dress the part. That instructors can see your position and outline, on the horse, so that they can help you ride better. And you want that help. You appreciate that help. As you want to ride better.
So what’s a girl to do, when most breeches suck! Especially, if you are like me, and returning to riding after having several kids, your body just isn’t what it used to be.
And I know – for those of you who know me - yes I know I am relatively skinny. I was lucky enough to be blessed with skinny, tiny genetics (try not to hate me too much!). But even I, sport a pretty mean muffin top these days. I mean you just can’t suffer through pregnancy and childbirth TWICE, and keep the same body that you had before children.
(And my hats off to you, if you have managed to have more than 2 children – because to me that’s just plain crazy!)
And even when my breeches might fit me everywhere else, my tummy sure likes to make its presence felt. (Hence my love for the daggy baggy jumpers.)
But breeches. They just make all our curves, our wobbly bits, and our perceived flaws, completely visible to the entire world. And whilst there are some breeches that are better than others – it can be tricky to find the exact pair that suits you and your particular shape. It can also be very disheartening.
(Personally, I ride a fair bit in the Horze Grand Prix Silicone Seat breeches – as they hold you in quite nicely, and in black, tend to hide the imperfections).
But if you can’t even cope with the aforementioned black breeches, what do you do?
You have two options.
You can either choose a daggy pair of jeans, and put up with your instructors bitter complaints. Or wear a trendy pair of Wrangler jeans and pretend to be a Western rider (no offence to those who ride Western, of course!).
But then most denim jeans, scratch the bejeezes out of your nice leather dressage saddle. So that may not be a great option.
Trust me, I’ve tried, and then cried bucketloads of tears, over my beautiful scratched English leather.
But maybe, just maybe, there might be an ‘in between’ solution. A hybrid solution. Personally - I really love a hybrid solution.
The Horze. Victoria. Denim. Breeches.
I felt that announcement, deserved it’s very own line.
Because this pair of breeches is just a little bit profound. And just a tiny bit awesome.
For these denim breeches, I reckon, are the bomb! Particularly, if you want to feel sexy and confident, around the paddocks AND in the saddle.
You know that feeling, when you slip into a new pair of jeans? A pair of jeans that fit you perfectly, and flatter your curves and streamline your figure? Jeans that make you feel amazing, and give you that magical air of confidence?
And then that horrible feeling, when you are standing in a saddlery store changing room, fighting back the tears, as you stare hopelessly at yourself, in yet another pair of horrible, ugly breeches, that just don’t look good. Anywhere. At least not on you.
But now you can have that perfect-new-pair-of-jeans-feeling, in a pair of breeches. The Victoria Denim Breech does just that. It flatters, it smoothes, and it holds in that muffin top. And yes, even mine! They fit like a glove. A perfect glove, but for your legs, tummy and hips.
They really can make you feel awesome again. And they are smart enough to impress any tough riding instructor. They won’t be able to complain. They will only be able to admire instead.
Add to that, the amazing silicone seat pattern. A silicone FULL SEAT criss cross pattern, across your bum that extends down to the inside of your knees. THIS full seat doesn’t restrict your comfort or riding. It looks pretty but also helps to improve your riding by keeping that sexy booty of yours, right where it should be. IN that saddle!
Because it’s amazing when you find that body confidence in a nice piece of clothing. It makes your spirits soar, your confidence lift and you proudly strut your stuff, in front of the world (rather than hiding from it).
And that’s what these denim jeans did for me. They just – like - totally fitted. And flattered my figure, and stuff! Just like a sexy pair of skinny jeans. With that extra detail of horsey style.
And when you feel confident in yourself – your horse notices. That confidence transfers to your riding. Amen for that!
So no more half-hiding behind your horse when talking to friends at your next riding clinic. Or strategically placing manure forks in front of you, as you casually lean upon them, trying to look cool as you go about your horsey chores. Because in these breeches you ARE cool. You are HOT. You are YOU.
But, but, BUT I hear you stammer! I am not a dressage rider, or a showjumper, you say.
I am just a trail rider! I don’t need breeches. Any jeans are ‘A-OK’ for me!
And I say this to you! You adventurous-trail-rider you! Have you ever been galloping through the bush, when your horse takes a sudden, unexpected turn?
And that beautiful leather half breed or stock saddle (that you swear you could never fall out of), is as slippery as all hell, that you slide straight off into the nearest blackberry bush? Ouch!
Silicone is the answer here!
Silicone sticks like mud to a piglet.
So with these denim breeches, you not only keep your ultra-cool and casual, ‘I’m-a-dare-devil-trail-rider’ look. But you get to stick to that stock saddle - like glue.
Neat hey?
Thinking you might have to sell your right arm and left foot, to be able to afford these magical-problem-solving-hybrid-denim-breeches?
I bet you are! But don’t panic just yet. These breeches aren’t as expensive as you might think. And at the risk of sounding like a Danoz Direct infomercial, no, they aren’t $200, and they aren’t even $150.
The Victoria Denim Breeches from our lovely friends at Horze (which is an exclusive, but affordable European brand by the way), are only $99.00.
And with AfterPay available, you can afford to have two pairs. Because trust me, you are going to want to live in these. Once you try them on, you won’t want to take them off. Ever. Again!
So don’t wait a second longer! Get your sexy back here >
But wait! There IS more! Thanks Danoz! They have a secret bonus, these fabulous hybrid-jean-breeches.
They look ever-so-normal when you need to wear them AWAY from the paddocks too.
So never again, will you have to panic about getting to school pickup on time, when you have been trying to squeeze in a ride (and then suffer the indignity of falling on your butt on your bedroom floor, as you try to rip your riding clothes off – in lightning fast speed to beat the ticking clock – and the withering look from your 6 year old as you tear up to the gate, LATE. Again!).
Because all the other not-so-horsey mummas, sitting perfectly-on-time at the school gate with their hair still intact, won’t be able to tell the difference (just pick the hay out of your hair BEFORE you get out of the car!).
In fact, they might even admire your perfect body in your perfect pair of skinny-jeans-come-breeches. They might even ask you where you got your tall boots from.
Need milk? Stop by that shop! Strut that booty down those shopping isles! Cause instead of the usual funny looks you might cop in your VERY obvious breeches (that normal non-horsey folks just don’t get) – you just know you will get looks of admiration instead.
Not to mention the reaction you are sure to get from your husband or partner. If he is anything like mine, who thinks breeches are pretty damn hot, then LOOK OUT when you wear THESE ones…
You are just one click away, from super (horsey) woman status when you get a pair of these:
So get your ultra-sexy-hybrid-denim-breeches-riding-jeans-thingys right here >
Happy riding…
Sarah
P.S And here I am - pretending to be a model (and clearly loving every second!) - in my super duper denim breeches:
